Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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