The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
