My Higher Power is John Stamos
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
