zippers are such a cool invention
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Randomize
