I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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