im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize