I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish you could order shots online.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize