I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
