so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
