She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
