Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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