How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
