Barsexuality is the new black.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
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