Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
Randomize