planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
