Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
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