Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
