so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
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