a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
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