I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Randomize
