I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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