Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
