I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
