i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
