How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize