I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
I skipped work to stalk him.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
