You're so nebulous sometimes
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
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