its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
