party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Panties = found
Randomize
