He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
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