This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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