He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
