I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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