We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
