Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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