Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I think your dad took our porno
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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