I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
His hands were made for my vagina.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
