I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize
