i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Randomize
