i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Randomize