btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
