My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Randomize
