If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
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