my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize