Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
The dick lei will go down in squad history
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
