Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I think your dad took our porno
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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