I wanna bring you to show and tell
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
