I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
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