He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
