Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize
