just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize